Who wants to be the girl to fits the conventions?
There is a turmoil in my already beleaguered thoughts as I ponder about the pre-provided mould of conventions that a girl has to shape herself in accordance with. It’s a pity how even the ever so advanced and the oh so modern society has pre-prescribed standards for a girl to follow and adhere to and if she dares to alter these lines of convention, she is doomed forever. The alterations can be as miniature as voicing one’s concerns at the grass-root level or as havoc creating as again voicing one’s concerns at the galaxial level – the point being , “A girl whosoever , wheresoever and whatsoever shouldn’t be allowed to raise her voice”, how emancipating is that !Being a girl and being born in a traditional Indian family is in itself a situation enough for others to understand and conclude that our abilities to adjust, adhere and assimilate are nothing short of being termed as miraculous. But what use is this advent of modernity if we aren’t able to break free from these expected “virtues” and unexpected “vices”. The point here is that as educated young ladies of today it’s our responsibility to use our sense of right and wrong before imbibing something old or before questioning something new and vice versa, than to be guided by the stale stances of the society. How blissful would that attained stage of all round amnesty be! It’s a very closely held notion that a girl “has to” behave in a certain manner and present herself in a particular way with regards to the community she is a part of and there are prerequisites that are meant to be met with before a girl earns the society’s nod of being a “sanskari” (well mannered) girl and other such candy-coated terms whose relevance is as conventional as is their applicability. As the society heads towards a more change accepting and adapting stage, it’s absolutely necessary that we as girls make the much needed changes to the way too stereotypical projection of how a girl is supposed to be and the conditions she is to necessarily fulfill in order to fall under the category of being a girl. A thought provoking scenario is prevalent in our surroundings where every step a girl takes is guarded by the question that “how” that step is to be taken and it’s astounding that a girl is expected to be socially correct with all her answers and approaches.As a girl, I believe that every girl has her own identity and asking her to fit into some conventionally made shoes is too much. Not only does it snatch away her thinking from her but she gets used to living life on the terms others have set for her. To be able to live life on her own terms, a girl has to make sure her identity remains distinguished and she remains honest to who she is or she she wants to be. It’s a pretty easy to understand thing that no two people can ever be similar then how can a same set of social obligations force them into being similar. Every person has a specific approach to life and should be free enough to pursue his life based on this approach, no matter how peculiar it seems to others, provided it doesn’t affect another person’s right to do the same. Being a girl with a different approach towards life , it might get hard to earn oneself the right kind of attributes from the people around but this is what makes travelling the unconventional route more interesting because the more successful the girl is the more easier it is for others to follow their own heart. Girls need to learn that to be truly loved one has to be understood as well as accepted with one’s flaws. The acceptance found via the sacrifice of one’s true self is short lived. Intellect should take the center stage not anything else that just has a timely relevance. We need to see that not everyone wants to fit into the conventions. There have been people and there will always be people who found success in their peculiarities and whose “stand out from the crowd” quality made their struggles a source of inspiration for others. Every girl has a distinct image of herself which she would love to paint with the bright colors of her own imagination. There are girls who fight for their own selves and their approaches towards life and somehow manage to break out of the vicious cycle of conventions and emerge as strong women who take pride in their true self.
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About the Author: This article is contributed by Uroosa Vani, our intern.
Also read: Is It Ok For Men To Be Feminine?
