Women, unlearn these 5 things society has taught you to always excel in life
It’s not easy to throw up all the filth of teachings we have been fed since childhood. Sexism and patriarchy peaks through the disguise of learning, sexist lessons that are entrenched in little girls mind before they can even question the validity of those.
Girls are asked to be quiet, humble, gentle, play with dolls, be beautiful, and most of all, be likable and ‘never overwhelm the opposite sex with charms and beauty.’
It all begins at home, with mothers and grandmothers who begin telling young girls to learn cooking and clean so they can find a suitable man to marry. Of course, these are basic life skills, but they are still termed as ‘women’s duties’ and the burder of the domestic chores often falls on the girl which she’s expected carry well into old age, eventually passing it on to daughters and daughters-in-law.
However, the world’s changing and gender-divisive chores are being called out for what they started out as: sexist and unpaid labour that women do at home. The days of celebration of misogyny are over and more women are putting a foot forward towards equality at workplace, in homes and society.
It’s possible that you may have grown up learning some valuable lessons imparted to you by the elders of the family or simply the social conventions but here are 5 things you need to unlearn right away if you wish to be your own person, individual and not just a mother, sister and wife.
1. You don’t have to be calm, quiet and composed all the time
It is a good virtue to be calm but you don’t have to be that if that’s who you aren’t. Find confidence and strive to be the best version of yourself, not what society tells you to.
2. You shouldn’t be chided for expressing your emotions
In life, there would be moments where you would overreact or underreact, not react the way people would want you to, react the way you didn’t expect yourself to, and it’s fine. Our emotions aren’t always in our control and they rule us and it’s fine sometimes. Evolve as a human being whose emotions are influenced by their surroundings and the world. But don’t rebuke yourself for having clarity over your emotions and expressing them.
3. Feminism isn’t misandry.
Feminism strives to achieve equal rights for women that were granted to men since the beginning of empires and civilization. It is standing up for women, not standing up against men. Only men with fragile egos who feed on unfiltered toxicity against women are hurt by women not being submissive to them. There’s no wrong in fighting for your rights.
4. Career and Love go hand in hand.
It’s typical of women being asked to choose between career and their love/marriage & children. Well, you don’t need to make that choice. Find a man who supports you as a working woman if you wish to continue working and being a mother and also when you choose to take retirement to focus on your home and children. A flourishing career helps bring economic stability and a fulfilling love life motivates us to do better in life. Men never had to choose in between, so why should women?
5. Showing off skin doesn’t make you an attention seeker
It’s your body and it’s upon you how you want to dress it. Your character and your qualifications don’t depend on your clothing choices at all. People have a lot to say but not everything needs to be heard.
Women went from being hardly mentioned in pages of History to creating History, and what those women mastered was the act of unlearning the pre-existing societal norms.
The modern society is continuously evolving, women need to evolve too, and learn to unlearn in order to seek what’s right for them and chase their dreams and freedom.