Marital rape is an upcoming issue and seems to have caught the attention of a large number of people on the internet. And it should! It is something that should be condoned and be made punishable by law. Rape is when you violate someone’s body without consent. So whether you’re married or not, the definition of rape stays the same. I was traveling in the metro once and I overheard a guy saying-“You know what the best part about arranged marriages are? Even if you can’t get laid with a girl your whole life, your parents will set you up with someone and you can just enjoy sleeping with her for the rest of your life!” I controlled my urge to slap him, but then again- he wouldn’t have been worth it. And the sad part is, thousands of people across the world think that way. They think that once you’re married, you’re automatically entitled to all the “privileges” of marriage, and one of them is sharing the same bed with someone. They think that if you get married, the person you marry belongs to you and can make you happy in any way you please. They think if you get married, when it comes to sex, the other person’s consent doesn’t matter. And if you’re one of those people and you’re reading this article, then I would like you to know that- YOU ARE WRONG. Marital rape has become such an issue because lately people have started to wake up from the age old notions of marriage, especially in India. Back in the old days, people were made to marry as means of increasing population. Seriously, how messed up is that? Women were basically seen as baby-producing machines! Another age old notion of marriage is that it is the only way you can have some sexual pleasure. Kings in the old days had many wives( look up Mughal history). And that notion’s passed down generations where men, mostly, derived that marriage is the only method of getting laid while getting the blessings of society. Because only when you’re married can you enjoy the company of a woman the way you want to, without anybody judging you. So there we have it folks! Because of these old conservative ideologies of marriage that dictate you must get married just so you can increase the family lineage and take part in sexual experiences, marital rape has found its place in the book of heinous crimes. Marital rape is not okay. In fact, I don’t see any sense in calling it “marital rape”. There should be no category for rape! Rape is rape, whatever said and done. Do not be swayed with the common thought process that once you get married, you are bound to have lots of sex because you must fulfill the wishes of your parents of providing them with grandchildren. Long gone are the days when you couldn’t oppose to such traditional practices that constrained that freedom of a woman or a man. If she or he doesn’t want it, don’t do it. And if your parents aren’t happy with that, then that’s fine. We live in a world where having sex with your partner isn’t the only way to have a baby. There are other means, like- adoption, surrogacy, etc. Remember, marriage isn’t just about you. It involves two people, so respect it’s sanctity by respecting the woman/ man you’re marrying.
About the Author: This article is contributed by Joshua Moses, our intern.