Down the memory lane…….

In most of the Indian homes, grandmothers occupy a position of pride and responsibility.They are an integral part of family as they are good at everything -be it managing household chores, taking care of children or managing finances .Grandmothers are the most lovable member of the family. Grandmother is extremely special to the grandchildren for the way she cares and loves them like those old pretty angels. It is often said that God created ”mothers and grandmothers” for he could not be present everywhere.

I too have such an angel and I got an opportunity to explore her days of the past during my visit to her home. She welcomed me with an ardent hug followed by a grin witnessing my loose hair. I became more curious and asked her whether she did not let her hair loose when she was young. She replied knocking my head that in those days’ women who used to let their hair loose were considered as transgressor and sinner. Our conversation became more intense and candid as she started explaining that in the past girls during their childhood used to wear skirts and during their teenage, wore shawls over their top and finally moved to sarees during their 20’s. During those days women were really hardworking as they used to go to crop fields and participated in farming activities like weed removal, collection of grown crops, cattle farming, etc.She told me about yet another shocking fact that girls on attaining puberty were out stationed from homes for nearly a month in a separately constructed house called ‘Kuchu’. They were prohibited from looking at men during their stay there and were given raw eggs, sesame oil, and spinach seeds to eat in order to enhance their pelvic bone strength. The only game that chased their solitude was ‘Pallanguzhi’-a game played with tamarind seeds on a wooden box with 14 pits. Neem leaves and an iron rod were meant to them as bodyguards to save them from the believed ghosts. Turmeric was used as soap during their menstruation days. Women were isolated during menstruation period every month from homes and separate utensils were used for them during the course of time.

She told me about various other rituals and superstitions that were being practiced It was horrible to hear that girls were married before they attained puberty, usually at an early age of 12. Also the bride’s mother was not permitted to sit in front of the bridegroom and if she did it was considered as a sign of impertinence. After marriage, it was mandatory for women to wear nose rings. bindi, earrings, bangles, anklets as they were considered as an integral part of women accessories. Dowry system was also prevalent and jewels, cattle, lands was being given in dowry. My grandmother’s words were constantly ringing inside my mind and I was perpetually pondering for long days whether women of today are blessed or cursed to have born at this age. After giving this conversation much thought I concluded that both good and bad prevailed in every generation. Women of those days are even stronger and contribute a worthwhile share in all day to day activities right from agriculture to housekeeping. But today most women do the work with the help of electrical equipments replacing physical works with mechanical work. At the same time, male chauvinism was at the peak in those days curtailing women’s development and entry into fields like space, politics, and administration, etc. which is really reprehensible. Today, though male domination has not shrunk, women of today have crossed horizons throwing all gender limitations and progressing in almost all fields.

In a nutshell, women of every era will have certain kinds of problems and difficulties which they have to face. Though the practices and superstitions of the good old days have been put to rest but the modern women must stick to the finest of rituals and culture which was relevant back then. Every era weaves its own good practices and attempts to shun the bad ones before moving it forward to future generations.